Keep Going…the World Needs You
What is the minimum that leads to the maximum? The "Three Gates" is one such. I know that if everything I said or did was honest, kind, and useful, I'd have an amazing life. If my goal then is to have such a life, one approach would be to include the Buddha in my "role models" group, visualize him every morning, and when I go to sleep at night and slide into the "Hypnogogic" state actually speak with him, and ask him to point out the moments during the day that I most closely walked the path, and when I most diverged.
Do this morning and night, and over time you will
Clarify your goal
Clarify the behaviors, values, and emotions that will take you to that goal
Begin to seek and identify resources to get or keep you on the path
Recognize more rapidly when you are NOT.
More quickly break negative patterns of thought and behavior, until that breaking becomes automatic
Begin to associate with others who also respect the Three Gates, building tribe, gathering mentors, and teaching others.
In other words, the MICRO (Morning Ritual, Five Minute Miracle (as you fall asleep) guides the MACRO.
Lets say you want to write a novel. If the MICRO is writing a sentence every day, then let's ask if that passes the Three Gates.
Is it TRUE that if you write a sentence every day, you can write a book in a year?
I believe this, yes. The reason is that most of what stops us from creating is not lack of skill, or time, or energy…it is lack of CONSISTENCY of work. We're "up day, down the next. Busy one day, lazy the next. And so on.
But if it is true that CONSISTENCY is the major question in the mastery of any skill, then finging the MINIMUM that will keep you engaged is a terrific way to approach it. You want to separate the voices in your head, the "busy-ness" from the reality.
People will define the IDEAL amount of work or time (say, a four-hour block, or 10 pages)
If they can't see how to set aside that block of time they give up, rather than adjusting to a smaller block.
If they can't do ten pages, they give up, rather than go for a smaller total.
And the sad thing is that if they had gone for that smaller, consistent amount, they'd have built up to the DESIRED amount.
"I don't want to spend less than four hours at a time" might pass the Gates.
"I don't have time to write in the way I want to" might pass the Gates
But "I don't have time to write" does NOT pass the Gates.
Can you sense the "I wanna" in that? The child tantrum? The "I wanna the way I wanna, and if you don't give it to me I take my ball and go home" voice?
If you can, consider this:
We discipline our children to do homework or housework because we KNOW that no matter how much they complain, if they will discipline themselves NOW they will have more choices, more freedom in life LATER. As adults, we understand the paradox of DISCIPLINE = FREEDOM. People who never learned to discipline themselves will be controlled by those who have.
And there is another thing: IF you get the ball rolling, because the human mind seeks to move away from pain toward pleasure (always), once you exert the discipline to force a situation, the student (or child self) will struggle at first…then give up and try to find the best, fastest, most pleasurable way of fulfilling the obligation (yes, they will buck like a bronco at first. Be strong!). And what happens? Often they start having fun.
The part of you resisting writing, using excuses that are "perfectly reasonable" will, if you exert enough discipline to force yourself to write just a single sentence, every day, eventually find a way to enjoy it. And it will say "oh @#$$...as long as I'm here, let me write another sentence. Wait…I know that Sheila would say next. I know what Brad would do when she says that. I can see the room they are in. I'll just describe that chair…."
In other words, get past all the b.s. and write that sentence, and keep doing it day after day, and eventually you will realize that maybe you fought your way to your desk, but once there you don't want to leave.
###
What is the MINIMUM with your business life? Might be ten minutes of prepping for work, or reminding yourself you want to be out of that job in a year. Millions change jobs. You probably think you're pretty smart. Intelligence is problem solving. Are they ALL smarter or luckier than you? Every one of them? Get to work.
What is the MINIMUM for fitness? Might be intermittent fasting and the Five Tibetans. Can't lie and say you don't have the time. I.F. will SAVE you more time than the Tibetans take. Find another lie. Tear that one down. Find another. Tear that one down until you get to the truth, the fear or identity at the core of all of it. Get allies and mentors to help you with that, but you have to pass the first Gate before you can even begin.
What is the MINIMUM for your relationships? Well, you need to start with your relationship with yourself. I'd say checking in with your Child self for "me" and some connecting ritual with your sweetie for the "us." Every day.
An overall "Morning Ritual" where you are focusing mind, emotions, and movement all together can do ALL THREE at the same time. Specifically, connect with being the person who can do the things, consistently over time, that will keep you on the path and take you to the mountain. Calibrate by taking constant actions and measuring the results. Course correct by constantly studying the actions and strategies of those who are ahead of you on the path, or who have already climbed the mountain. Seek the similarities between their words, and the DIFFERENCES between them, and those who fail.
CONSTANT action. CONSTANT study. CONSTANT self-correction.
Chop Wood, Carry Water. Finding joy in life, growth, work, and service.
Once you understand this dynamic process, just make sure you don't have a "zero" in any of the basic categories (Model, Actions, Gratitude, Intention, Confidence) and then trust time to get you there (the numbers "50" or "100" seem to be powerful: "I will write and submit 50 stories". "I will do a morning ritual for 100 days" and so forth)
There are of course other paths. I simply hope you find one that works for you, gives you growth, joy, and success. And that you will keep learning, keep trying, keep searching, until you find it. But I want to reiterate as strongly as possible: this path is real. It works, if you do.
But remember: your ego will try very hard to convince you that the problems are external. I suggest you pay attention primarily to the one part of the equation you can control: your own actions and emotions. And if you cannot now control them…find the resources and allies to help you do that. Yup. Make that another goal, determine the minimum that you can believe would get you there (twenty minutes a day to transform your life?) give yourself a year to get there, and promise to not even EVALUATE the results until you have done your daily rituals for some objective chunk of time. 30 days. 50 days. 100 days. A year. SOMETHING.
Keep track of all the things you do, all the things your unconscious will throw at you, in a journal. Eventually, your ego will run out of tricks, and the truth will emerge. This too can be frightening if you think your "true self" is unlovable or ugly. The truth is that your "core self" is perfect and beautiful, that at the core of every action you or ANYONE else has ever taken is an attempt to return to the sense of peace once experienced in the womb.
Or for those of a spiritual bent…a desire to connect with the Divine.
If you can proceed with this faith, work though all the doubt and fear and anger and grief and resistance…you will find, after chopping enough wood and carrying enough water…
That you are in new territory. And turn around and yell "this way!" to the others. And hear the same excuses from them you used to give to yourself.
Such a good joke. Such a wonderful joke. Laugh your fill…then keep going. Because SOME of those people behind you are dying to believe you have really freed yourself. Can they slow you with guilt, the way others slowed them? Can they confuse you, as they are confused? Can they force you to doubt your perceptions, as others caused them to doubt theirs?
Do you grasp that at some level they are BEGGING you to succeed, to prove that you are really who and what you say?
Keep going. Find your minimum. Do it, every day. Never stop.
Bring light into the world.
Namaste
Steve
