The Three Gates as Diagnostic
The Three Gates as Diagnostic
More thoughts on the relationship between the Three Gates (Is it True? Is it Kind? Is it Useful?)…can we tell anything about those who violate them?
I'm honestly not certain. But am sharing my thoughts.
IF one's goals are purely mundane, and devoid of spiritual content, then you can indeed lie and practice cruelty, and still reach those goals.
One might then modify the usefulness of the Three Gates to suggest that those who Lie, or practice Cruelty, are either ineffective at reaching their goals, or have no spiritual or ethical content to their goals. IF this is true, then it becomes more and more important to select and nurture goals that will transform you into someone you want to be.
In my system, you choose three goals minimum, in each of three major arenas:
Relationships
Career
Physical health
And this would be the way of looking at it that would make sense to me:
Relationships. Start with self-love. And this needs to be honest, because if not, it won't hold under pressure. A bunch of ego can produce massive apparent confidence, but watch that person when things go really wrong. Then…extend to one other person, minimum. You can be dishonest here, at the cost of true intimacy, and I hazard that what we want is that deep, connected sense of being seen. That someone, somewhere, gives the final damn whether we live or die. You cannot lie your way into this. You CAN have a transactional relationship: Her beauty for his money is typical and we can point to countless examples of it in major media. But IMO it is no way to live if there is no genuine honesty and connection.
Career. Long-term, honesty and networked relationships work better even just for making money. How else will people of quality know they can trust you with their time, energy, and resources? You might well get away with it for a while, but the quality of the people you work with will get lower and lower. On the other hand, a pattern of honesty and love toward those you do business with allows you to connect and network with other honest, kind people. Guess what? THEY HAVE MONEY TOO. And if you earn your way into THAT network…well, its worth it to reject short-term dishonest gains for long-term deep and lasting success…as well as sleeping better at night.
Physical Health. You'd better not lie to yourself about how much you are exercising and/or eating. About how much stress your body-mind can handle in a given workout. Dishonesty will lead to dysfunction.
All of that said, are there times you don't owe others total honesty? You bet. Playing poker demands skillful bluffing, and that's not a bad metaphor for business negotiations. Navigate this carefully. How about champions who say "I am the Greatest!" before proving it, or even though they have self-doubt. Navigate this carefully: it is a version of Tananarive's "throw your hat over the fence and climb after it." You make a big claim, and then move heaven and Earth to live up to it. This is a highly effective technique for those who can handle it. Again, be careful…you can get lost in these weeks.
Efficient and effective? There are unwise people who would interpret this as "work all the time, right?" Nope. You have to ask what LONG term efficiency and effectiveness is. And that demands REST AND RECREATION. It's in the science, and in practical human experience. Fun is GOOD. Play is WONDERFUL. If you don't get enough rest, you will burn out and break down.
Just thoughts. I think then, that if Jason's goal is to make a million dollars by the time he is 25, he will want to include a few things, like "and stay within the Three Gates" and maybe "and have FUN in the process" and "in balance with heart and body."
Or "Balancing the Three Gates and the Three Centers." That should take care of it. There will be people who make progress by cheating, lying and stealing. Yes. And there are guys who pick up girls by lying to them, yes. And people who achieve championship bodies by "cheating" with drugs that are damaging or illegal. Yes.
So your goals must be balanced to protect YOU and also the community FROM you.
In this framework, the notion that there is tensegrity between the Three Gates and Three Centers makes real sense IF you choose your goals carefully. And that those who violate them are in extraordinary circumstances (lying to muggers, killing in war) and that the moral human might struggle with some of this, and need a conversation with a Shaman, Priest, Therapist, or Elder to assure them they are on the Path. And it would be useful to ask questions about someone who views the world as a state of continuous war. That would justify lying and cruelty on a daily basis. What kind of person sees the world in such a way? Or seeks out situations that justify dishonest or cruel behavior?
These are questions each of us must work through on our own. Choose your goals carefully. There is nothing worse than winning at a game that wasn't worth playing in the first place. Or as Sun Tzu said:
"there are battles it is not worth winning."
There are, in other words, goals it is not worth achieving. Be careful with your goals. And be careful in your dealings with people who defend dishonesty or cruelty, or seem to find themselves frequently in situations that demand that.
It shreds the soul. Our warriors and guardians often have to play that edge, which is one reason we need to nurture and love them when they return from the battlefield: IT COSTS THEM. Make no mistake. But beware of the warrior who NEEDS war to feel whole.
That person…is sliding down the razor blade of life (thank you Tom Lehrer) and can be very, very dangerous to be around.
Namaste
Steve
